PIES AND THIGHS

Pies And Thighs, 351 Kent Ave., (South 5th St.), (347)282-6005. ?? to 9 p.m.

I was going to save this for Thursday The Long Way but I'll have to take a Southern route that way some other time-- I can't wait any longer.

I went to college in Washington D.C., but I wouldn't call that "the South." My first real experience with Southern food wasn't until 2003 when I did a road trip from Atlanta to Key West. The meal which began the two-week trip was at a place called Mary Mac's Tea Room. You're given a menu and a card on which to scratch off sides from Hoppin' John to Chicken and Dumplings, Pot Likker and Squash Souffle. In the interests of full disclosure, let's say that afterwards I bought the T-shirt, really. And when it comes to Southern food, I following its instructions, "Eat It All Up." I'm a dog left alone with a case of chocolate. I eat until something bad happens. I'm sure you can all tell me where this sets my standards for Southern food or whether I don't know my Cheese grits from my Chowchow.

Past Dumont Burger a little ways, near Dressler and Marlow & Sons, down by the river, there's a place under the Williamsburg Bridge on the corner of Kent and South 5th St., called Pies and Thighs. One block from the river, you wouldn't happen across it, practically under the bridge. On my first visit there wasn't a sign. The kitchen is smaller than mine and the outside dining room, complete with red and white checkered plastic tableclothes is a concrete yard behind a chain-link fence topped with barbed wire. You can sit next to the smoking pork and listen to cars go over the bridge. New York Press and New York Magazine both recently noted it and my experience there did nothing to dissuade me from my fascination.

You order the food inside and sit at your table and look at the sky or grab a beer and look down the block at the light glimmering off the water. It's not long before someone brings the food. The Fried Chicken Box (far right)comes with a side and a biscuit ($8), the Carolina Pulled Pork Box comes with cole slaw, a pickle and a side ($8), and the Fried Catfish Box (right, middle) comes with Tartar sauce, cole slaw, a pickle and cornbread. The burger with fries ($8) is listed on the menu as having an option for bacon ($1) and a fried egg ($1).

The fried chicken was peppery and very salty, but in a good way (warning: if I ever own a restaurant it will likely be named 'SLV' for Salt, Lemon and Vinegar). The catfish wasn't the highlight of the evening but it was good, firm and nicely seasoned with the small cormeal bits that give it a pleasantly contrasting grit. Accompanied by a cole slaw so fine I'd say it was past a brunoise, and a thick wedge of buttered cornbread that was good even though it wasn't right out of the oven, the catfish (along with practically everything else) went well with a hot sauce kept in a jug by the kitchen door. I guess its standard issue, vinegary and tasting like buffalo wings, but it sure is tasty. So too, the sides ($3).

I'm not a huge fan of collared greens but these are served in a homey broth with equal portions of pulled pork. If there's anything my French chefs say makes things taste better besides butter, it's pork. Okay, the beans were forgettable, the iceberg lettuce with buttermilk dressing was a waste of belly-space and the biscuits were good and not quite Flying quality. Still, the potato salad's sauce was well vinegared and included a much-underutilized ingredient, small-chopped pickle, more than compensating. So did the hush puppies, good give with chopped onions inside as well as the spicy Mac-N-Cheese. I'd bet the tangy flavor of the Mac-N-Cheese comes from that jug of hot sauce, and it makes the cheese a little gritty, even a little curdled, but in the way I just kept spooning it down.

Rice Krispie treats (right) are served in healthy blocks, good and gooey, I've used them as a palate cleanser for the rest of the desserts. The Cookies aren't my style. They were a good size and soft from 1/3 of the cookie-width on up but a little too cooked on the bottom for my liking. That said, the double-crust strawberry-rhubarb pie made me understand why people make it, the key-lime pie was tart and refreshing.
The peanut-butter chocolate pie, an inch of peanut-butter under a thin chocolate layer of pudding sent me home where I was absolutely useless in a happy-coma wondering about the how what seemed like two employee/owners could possibly deliver from North 12th Street to South 8h Stree and Kent Avenue to Marcy Avenue and pondering how Saturday and Sunday brunch biscuits and gravy might taste (menu below left, pies can be bought for $24 with one day's advance notice).

Someone described Pies and Thighs as a friend's kitchen. To appropriate a word in good faith, I don't know who y'all are friends with but please, introduce me.

Perhaps Stephen Tanner or Sarah Buck are just from nearby Diner and not from the South. Frankly, I don't care if they're from Chappaqua.

You pay inside. My last visit cost $52 with a $10 tip for three entrees, three sides, and two desserts-- just $17 per person and I had to remind them (working backwards) what I ordered. And when you tell them the price is a steal you know they know and they're proud of it.

There's also the indoor bar (outside of bar, left), centered around a statue of a woman that looks like it came from a pirate ship. It's a large circular bar around which I've seen men whose faces make them look 60 but whose arms look like those of a Marvel superhero. My first time I got the feeling that I was treading on someone else's hallowed ground. Someone else's treasure-trove. On my second I was looking at others as though they'd found mine. Actually, it's the kind of place you want to share, and so far the kind of place where you won't be the only person gushing. Everyone at the tables around me were wearing their Thanksgiving faces. Did I mention they have air hockey? Also, I don't smoke anymore but ahem, they even carry my notoriously-difficult-to-find-on-road-trips brand (American Spirits) which I've never seen in a machine.

Oh, the burger? It's not a Dumont burger, but it's also not in the gourmet burger category. It's better stacked up against the Shack. I might have to give the edge to the Shack on taste but only slightly and the Pie-burger is a little bigger...I'd say it's a toss up but there isn't a line down the block to eat at Pies N Thighs, at least, not yet. I'd go now.